How to talk to my mom about my depression?

I'm 14 and I've been depressed for about two years now. And I just wanna be better. I never thought I'd be like this, and I wanna be happy again. But I miss not having to try. I started cutting myself when I was 12. I didnt tell anyone because it was something to do with the pain, not for attention. But after awhile a teacher found out and told my parents. They sent me to consuling and after a few times I quit and my mom didn't seem to have a problem with it. I guess she just thought I would magically get better. And I did, but it wasnt long before I was cutting again. And again, my mom found out but I lied and told her they were old cuts, and she believed me and said nothing more. I've done better with the cutting but I've made other mistakes. I've smoked weed and drank. And I just don't wanna mess my life up! I havnt been able to sleep lately, all I wanna do is lay in bed an it seems like I'm always fighting with my mom. She doesn't know I'm hurting. And I'm glad because I just wanna get better on my own, but now I'm realizing that I'm not getting any better. I just want good things to happen. I'm a cheerleader and I have alot of good friends an I don't wanna mess that up. But at the same time I want to get better. I've attempted suicide twice but I'm not that selfish. So please help me! Would anti-depressants help? And how do I ask my mom for them? Thanks.